Table of Contents
- Why is it so painful for my pet to die?
- The grieving process after the loss of a pet
- What to do if my pet died and I can't stop crying?
- When should I get a new pet after one dies?
My cat died last week and I can't stop crying about it.
Many people think that losing a pet is nothing major, but the emotional impact of losing an animal can be enormous. I loved my cat very much and she was with me for 13 years. Now my life feels empty.
Since you're on this page, I'm sure you're dealing with something similar. Maybe you lost your dog, guinea pig, or hamster. Any pet that has died leaves a hole in our lives. And the feelings of sadness and pain can be worse if you have made the decision to euthanize your pet.
However, crying is a natural part of the grieving process. We must allow ourselves to grieve the loss of our pets in order to move on. I discuss this and all the other feelings you might experience if you lose a pet. Although you may never get over your loss, you can and will be happy again.
Why is it so painful for my pet to die?
Anyone who has never owned a pet struggles to understand the emotional ties we have to our pets. My cat was with me every day and became a true member of the family. I'm sure the bond you had with your pet was just as strong. Pets are more than just animals, they are our best companions.
For one, they make our lives brighter.Cats have a sense of humor.and my cat made me happy every day. Even little things like lookingmy cat makes me cookiesor when theysleep between my legsHe made me smile. Surely your cat or another pet has also brought you a lot of joy, sometimes even without meaning to.
They are there for us even in our darkest days. Every time I feel downMy cat follows me everywhere and sleeps with me..my cat is sitting next to meeven if i feel lonely, andsleep on my chestto show you care.Cats know when you're sickalso andmine gave me comfort whenever i needed it.
In addition, they give us meaning and responsibility for another living being. We need to care for our animals and have a purpose. For anyone who depends on their cat or dog for emotional support, or who has a service animal, the bond is even stronger as this responsibility for care and support goes both ways.
When a pet dies, you are understandably very upset. Depending on how close you were to your pet, the loss may be similar to the loss of a friend or relative. Although you are not human, you have lost a companion. I even miss the little things like my cat not being there.lick me when i caress itsleep with me at night. And I can't stop crying about it!
It is important to remember that we are not alone. What you feel is valid and fair. We all deal with grief differently, and it's normal to feel sad in the days, weeks, or months after a pet dies. Sometimes this can seem overwhelming, but you can and you will be fine again.
The grieving process after the loss of a pet
Everyone grieves a little differently and goes through the process at their own pace. And most importantly, there is no right or wrong way to mourn the loss of an animal. We all have our own way of dealing with loss and must allow ourselves to feel whatever emotions arise.
However, the grieving process tends to follow a similar path and can generally bedivided into five stages. Human beings often go through these stages, going back and forth. The phases can also be displayed in a different order. Others may not go through the cycle at all! Like I said, grief is different for everyone. But here's a look at the "most common" grieving process.
When we initially lose our pet, most people fall into a state of denial. This is a coping mechanism that most of our brains use to relieve pain. We pretend that the reality of losing a pet is not true and we refuse to accept the truth. Due to the new and disturbing reality to hold on to, we end up in denial instead of processing the pain.
Many people will then develop feelings of anger. We are not necessarily angry about anything in particular, but rather use anger as an outlet for our overwhelming emotions. It is easier to be angry than sad because we are not as vulnerable. You could also be angry with yourself, especially if your pet died for a reason that you can control.
Then come overwhelming feelings of sadness and depression. My pet died and I can't stop crying so I can say I'm at this stage. You may also feel hopeless, powerless, and isolated. For many, depression lasts longer. You can also go from depression to anger or to the next level: bargaining.
Negotiation is the stage where you feel guilty. My cat died of heart disease and for a while I blamed myself for not taking her to the vet sooner. You could punish yourself for leaving medical issues open or leaving your cat outside at night and getting hurt. At this stage you will ask yourself things like "What if she had done more?"
After progressing through the four stages above, you will eventually reach a point of acceptance. That doesn't mean you're glad your pet is dead or forgotten. Instead, it means that you have finally accepted that they have died and are ready to move on with your life without them by your side.
What to do if my pet died and I can't stop crying?
Your pet has died and you can't stop crying. Now what? Life feels meaningless and you can't perform simple tasks without getting angry. So what should we do? Here are some tips you can try to help you get through the grieving process.
1. Make you cry
If your pet has died and you can't stop crying, you probably want to bury those feelings and try to talk yourself into being happy again. They want to be able to stop the tears. You want your life to be okay again. However, if you are devastated by the loss of your pet, you need to feel those negative emotions and allow yourself to grieve.
Don't be ashamed of being upset or try to hide it. We cannot and should not turn off our emotions. As just mentioned, being upset is part of the natural grieving process. Without processing the emotions and allowing ourselves to be sad, we may never really get to the acceptance stage. Burying your struggles will only prolong your grieving process.
2. Trust in friends
Losing a pet can feel extremely isolating. I know I'm struggling a lot with that. I've been spending quality time with my cat every day that now he feels empty.Cats purr when you pet them., so my house also feels quiet and lonely. Also, no one seems to understand exactly how I feel.
I have found that confiding in friends who have pets is very helpful. Finding friends who have the same pets as you is also helpful. Many of my friends have dogs and they didn't understand the emotional bond I had with my cat. But other cat lovers understood exactly the struggles I'm going through. Even expressing how you feel can take a load off your shoulders.
3. Write down your feelings
If you don't have anyone to talk to or would rather not talk about how you feel, try writing down your thoughts and feelings. I personally like to write in a journal every morning. I can download all my negative thoughts at the beginning of each day. Putting them down on paper serves as an outlet and allows you to acknowledge how you feel.
Another idea I found online is to write letters to your deceased pet. This can be anything from how your day went to things you'd like to explain to your pet if she were still alive. Keep these letters in a special place.
4. Say goodbye properly
There is no reason that funerals are only for people. While not a pleasant experience, officially retiring your beloved pet can help you cope with the loss. From here you can start to get over it and move on with your life.
If you don't want to organize a funeral with your loved ones, you can simply write a poem or eulogy for your pet and say it out loud. This can be your version to calm them down. It still accomplishes the same thing: it allows you to acknowledge the reality that your pet is gone and find peace with it. They can start celebrating their lives instead of mourning their loss.
5. Stay active
It can be hard to think about anything other than your pet after death. However, you must persevere and keep doing things for yourself even when life seems pointless. One of the best things you can do is exercise. Staying active increases endorphins in the brain and makes you feel happier than before.
Staying active also helps keep you healthy. When grieving, it can be easy to neglect things like healthy eating, exercise, and good hygiene. Still, we must be strong and healthy to mentally overcome the loss we face.
6. Find another source of meaning
I certainly feel like I've lost my purpose now that my cat has died. I used to get up early every morning to feed her, spend time every day playing with her and give her lots of love and care. He had to show up for her! But now my life lacks meaning and purpose.
If you feel the same way, you need to find another source of meaning. And that doesn't necessarily mean you have to rush to get another pet. In fact, I would advise against doing it too quickly, as you will never fully process the loss. Life can make sense in many ways! You might consider joining a volunteer group or starting a new hobby that you have put on the back burner. Do something for yourself.
7. Seek professional help
If you still can't stop crying and feel like your grief is becoming unhealthy, don't be afraid to seek professional help. However, because we all process grief at different stages and times, it can be difficult to know when the right time is to seek help. I recommend contacting a professional if any of the following apply:
- Total power loss:It is relatively normal to spend a few days upset and in bed after the death of a pet. But if after a week or so you still have trouble getting out of bed and doing your normal daily activities, you should consider seeking help. You don't want the loss of a pet to have a negative impact on other areas of your life.
- weightloss:When we are upset, stressed, and anxious, it is common for us to lose our appetite. Just the thought of eating can make you gag! These feelings can last a few days or a week. However, when a lack of appetite leads to weight loss, things go too far.
- depressive thoughts:It is normal to negotiate and blame yourself for the loss of your pet. However, extremely harmful negative thoughts and self-hatred are a sign that your mental health is deteriorating. Thoughts about self-harm and that life is not worth living should also be taken very seriously.
Even if all seems lost, it's never too late to seek help. Admitting that you need help is often the hardest step. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed and never give up.
When should I get a new pet after one dies?
Many people rush to get a new pet when they do. They want to fill the space in their life with a new animal. So they won't feel so alone. On the other hand, some people go the other way. They don't feel like they can share their life with another pet. They feel that no animal can ever fill that void.
There is no "perfect" time to get a new pet. This depends on you and your current state of mind. What I do want to say though is this: avoid the rush and get a new pet right away. You need time to process the grief of your pet that has passed away. Otherwise, you may be upset that your new pet is not living up to your expectations and you may never fully process the loss of your old pet.
Instead, wait until you find some kind of peace with the loss. She must be able to look ahead and want to form a new relationship with a new pet. For some people this can last a few days or weeks. For others, it can take several months to get into the right frame of mind.
If you decide you're ready for another pet, here are some tips on how to get it right:
- Don't make hasty decisionsand allow yourself to reflect on whether or not this is the right move. Make sure this is your decision and don't let the opinions of friends and family change what you think is best. Only you know how you feel.
- Don't get a new pet to replace the old one. This will only lead to disappointment as your new pet will not be the same as the old one and will not live up to your expectations. Instead, try to get a pet that is the opposite of your old pet and with which you can develop a whole new relationship.
- Make sure all family members are ready to welcome a new pet into the family.. When people, especially children, are still dealing with the loss of the old pet, acquiring a new one can be detrimental. Everyone must be ready.
MY FINAL THOUGHTS
Losing a pet is an extremely painful experience and there are no good or bad feelings. It may take a few days, weeks, months, or even years to fully accept the loss of your pet. If you can't stop crying, that's okay! Allow yourself to suffer and remember that you are not alone.
Remember that even if your pet is gone, nothing and no one can take away the memories you shared. And one day you will be able to remember those times with a smile.